Episode 7 of "Oz"
s01e07 Plan B

Said wakes up from his heart-attack with only one thought on his mind: Must. Find. Mershaw. Mershaw's prematurely spreading the word that Said told him to lead the Muslims in case of an emergency. Enter Said. Mershaw is cast out and no Muslim is to talk or look at him. Burn! Mershaw, after feebly trying to get back into the fold, settles for selling Said out instead. He goes to Glynn and McManus and tells them that Said is stockpiling weapons but McManus ain't buyin' what Mershaw's sellin'. Glynn's not so sure that Mershaw's lying so they have a shakedown. The result? Damn, there's a lot of pointy objects about! McManus is not pleased to say the least and orders that tv, gym and phone priveleges be revoked for one month. Alvarez mumbles "Gee, Dad, I hope I can still make it to the Prom." Make that 2 months. C'mon, McManus, funny's funny. The inmates learn Mershaw's to blame for the shakedown, and as he's transferred into gen pop, they all spit at him. Double burn! Mershaw takes their expectorating personally and offs himself in his cell. Sayonara, sellout. Said isn't pleased with the way the FBI investigations are going and he causes a little media ruckus. Glynn makes an order that no group may wear similar clothes, have prayer beads or any of the other knick knacks that make organized religion cool. Hey, Muslims, are your ears burning? 'Cause Glynn's talking about you. Said ain't gonna play Glynn's game and insists he doesn't need all the trimmings to be a true Muslim. Word. He organizes a protest in the cafeteria against the FBI ruling that the 5 deaths that have recently occured in Oz were all inmate-caused. The display catches the attention of one Donald Groves. Groves begins to idolize Said and decides the best way to show his devotion is to kill Glynn. Well, the boy always was a bit unorthodox. He accidentally kills a C.O. named Lawrence Smith instead and is sentenced to die. Remember what I said about Groves being a little unorthodox? Yeah, about that. He chooses to die by firing squad. Hunt, one of Smith's buddies wants to be one of the trigger-pullers and is allowed to, despite Glynn's reservations. Meanwhile, the other officers take their frustration out on the other inmates. Play nice, boys. One of the new officers brought in to help ease the tension leaves Said a little present in his laundry. It's a gun. Wouldn't a nice mint on a pillow have sufficed? Groves gets a visit from Smith's mother who is *waaaay* too forgiving, considering the circumstances. Groves is moved by her and asks Father Mukada to copy down his last words so that he can pass them on to Mrs. Smith. Mukada swears to do so but Groves' last words are made unintelligble by a faulty speaker. Seems not only is life a bitch in Oz, so is death. As for Hunt, shooting Groves didn't give him the peace of mind he thought it would. Hate to say "I told you so." Now, for the cultural portion of the program. Eugene Dobbins is a musician in Oz, of the cellist variety. He says his cello is lonely because it has no one to play with. Methinks this cello guy is a wee bit off his rocker. Hill likes him, though. He likes him a hell of a lot more than his "hero" Jackson Vahue who's snorting like there's no tomorrow. Sister Pete advises Hill to get another hero, and he does: himself. Hill arranges for a trumpet player to make Dobbins' cello less lonely and feels good... for about 3 minutes until Vahue's harrasses Dobbins and then later breaks his cello. Bastard. Well, that about does it for culture. Let's go see how Schibetta's doing. Hey, I guess Ryan's poisoning paid off because now Schibetta's bleeding from all his facial orifices (I'm not even going to speculate about non-facial ones). That'll teach Nino to call Ryan a stupid mick bastard. Adebisi and O'Reily let Said know that any business he had with Schibetta now belong to them. Said isn't exactly shaking in his khofi. Hey! It's Long Vern Silver! Schillinger's back in action, but one eye's temporarily out of commission. McManus can't decide whether to move Beecher or Schillinger out of Em City but Schillinger's sassmouth makes the decision for him. Bye Vern, enjoy Unit B. Beecher doesn't get the warm return he hoped for, as Schillinger's cronies taunt him. At least he smashed those ugly glasses of his in the hole. He asks McManus to move him around, but McManus rightly points out that he ain't no travel agent. Well, like I always say: If you can't get your way, kick someone in the nuts. Beecher does just that to Schillinger when they meet in the gym. But he doesn't stop there, my friends, oh no. There's a hit to the head with a weight, a slamming of the chest with a bench and then, le piece de resistance: He takes a poop right in his face. Oh yeah, baby. Long live CrazyBeecher!